Where did that girl go?!

Nearly everything changes. Nearly EVERYTHING will change at some point in your life, if not everything, and the way that you feel about it is going to be however you take it and what you take from it. 

I moved houses when I was seven, so I don’t remember it all too much. I remember liking the other house better, but I ended switching schools three years later and remember hating that. I remember losing someone who was very close to me, and I remember when I was a terrible speller. All of those things, however, now have changed. 

Your family composition might change throughout your elementary, middle and high school career, but college it might change drastically by who you consider your family. What’ll change the most, in my opinion, is your friends and the way that you think about things.  College will change you for better or for worse. It sounds like a marriage proposal, but to me, it practically is. You have to cater to it constantly or it’ll fail, you have to pay loads of money into it, you must remain constant relationship levels, and you’ll lose a lot of friends. Marriage, to me, sounds SO MUCH LIKE THAT. 

I lost a lot of friends my freshman year of college. I should say that it’s mostly my sophomore year because I feel like freshman year is the honeymoon stage. Unless you’re rushing a sorority/fraternity, or just cut off contact with the world; you’re more than likely one of those people who’re going to keep contact with the people you were just “best friends” with in high school. I had a couple of best friends, ones that I was very close to in high school. We’ve lost almost all contact and the last time I saw one of them, i didn’t know how to speak anymore— it was as if we were strangers all over again.

If you think about it, we’re all strangers at some point. Even your parents are strangers and you have to get to know them and they have to get to know things about you. It’s a fantastic learning opportunity to learn about new people, but it can hurt you, too. Personality types clash. They clash a lot. I’ve become a person that I’m terribly bad at confrontation. I used to be able to walk up to anyone and talk to them. WHERE DID THAT GIRL GO?! I, for one, would really like to know, because I’d happily trade the me-now for the me-in high school. The me in high school wouldn’t take any bullshit. A lot of people didn’t like me (which hurt me) but the me freshman year of high school was able to approach any situation and handle it like an adult. Now I just cry, even when I’m pissed off, I cry. That’s one thing that I wish I could change now, especially since I’m becoming more of a “grown up” (whatever that is?)

What’ll change the most other than your friendships, honestly depends on who you live with. If your personality clash is enough to make you feel uncomfortable: get out of it. Regardless of how comfortable you feel, do it. Today, what changed the most in my life for the week, is how adults in my life seem to be a lot less mature than I am. It’s very, very sad, but at the same time you have no control over other people. Don’t think that you do, because you don’t. You absolutely don’t.

I started this blog in two parts, the prior from when I thought everything was going right in my life. After writing that everything changes, everything did change. I no longer have somewhere to live in my house and made the living situation not so hot for the other people I live(d) with. I got told I was taking advantage of them; so I took the TV and the internet router, and then got ripped a new asshole for it. What I don’t understand is how someone can be blamed for taking advantage of other people whenever I did everything myself, I bought everything myself. I asked one of them for help once, and I graciously paid her back for it as well. I did nothing, and I am still getting the shit end of the deal. 

Basically, your morals in life will be extremely questioned. I always thought I was going to be a virgin until I was married thanks to good ‘ole Jonas boys, but ironically, Nicholas and I were deflowered right around the same time. Everything changed for us, except for the fact that he’s dating Miss Universe and has a billion dollars; while I’m sitting in my parents basement by myself, making less than $300 a paycheck and bumming for everything. 

i’m not saying “screw your morals,” but keep your morals strong or don’t keep them at all. Strong morals and the Lord are things that are going to get you through life. I should’ve realized this a long time ago, but I didn’t. Tomorrow, I’ll wake up bright and early and go to church, and hopefully start my day on a positive note. My morals were strongly questioned in high school and college, and I went against a majority of them. i shouldn’t have, but I can’t change the past. I can only better the person that I am now, and hope that the Lord can see the good in me and send good things my way instead of making this past week the worst week of my life. 

Make sure that you live alone if you're a B1

If I could move right now, I probably would. The entire point of me constructing this sentence that’s going to end in several paragraphs? I CANNOT WAIT TO FUCKING MOVE. 

First things first, i know I’ve complained about my roommates to the utmost that I absolutely could, but I’m going to continue to do it. I cannot stand living with people who are complete idiots and complete assholes. The people I lived with last year were bitches for absolutely nothing, and let me tell you, my roommates this year haven’t changed a bit. They actually might have gotten worse, to say the best about them. 

I’m currently on a snow day from my classes, all of our street is covered and there’s no getting out of our driveway basically. Our lovely neighbors parked in front of my car, so there’s absolutely no getting out of the driveway unless I go and find out who is parked in front of me, and that’s a compilation of around 100 people. I’m frankly not that into going around and knocking on that many people’s doors. Therefore, apparently I’m stuck in my driveway until these assholes decide that they’re going to move. Fun, right?

I was crafting last night, because I’m smart enough to actually go and find something to do if I know that there’s going to be a potential snow day. Apparently my roommates are not, however. My roommate this morning came downstairs and started cleaning our entire living area/kitchen. They’re kind of combined, but are separated by a wall, just to give you an idea. There’s a table that’s right by the wall that’s supposed to be used to eat on, but is unfortunately mostly used to put shit on and then her clean it off whenever she gets pissed off enough.  I’ll just name my roommates now on by B1, B2, & B3. 

My shitty week started when B2 brought over some girl that I don’t like. It has been known in our house that this girl and I don’t get along, but she does it anyway. I’m doing my homework sitting in my room as B2 is complaining to this girl that she got fired from her job and she thinks it’s bullshit because she even went in on her off days and did work. She’s been home more than I have, and I only work 15 hours a week, just to give you a rough estimate of how much she actually works. She then complained about how they wouldn’t keep letting her get her hair done for free and all that jazz. Because apparently now it’s okay to basically take stuff from your job? 

B1 & B2 have made plans to move in together after our lease is up. I’ve made plans to move within the next two weeks. They’re moving in to some lavish apartment that is on the outskirts of one of the golf courses in this town and is around $670 a person. AkA: outrageous. They’ve been buddy-buddy since they’ve made these plans. B2 has been consulting her mother on this instead of herself, since she’s apparently that irresponsible. 

B1 claims that cleaning is her “hobby.” I don’t know any person that cleans for a personal hobby, and I personally don’t want to. She doesn’t have class on Tuesday’s and Thursday’s (at all) and “cleans” all day and watches Law & Order basically. I’m 99% positive she’s seen every single episode and could quote them word for word. It’s that bad. Normally she cleans when nobody is here during the day, and I’m perfectly fine with that because of the fact that nobody is here. However, I AM HERE. B3 went to her friends house (who lives on the same street) to do who knows what after asking if she could eat some of the food that I had made and borrow some ingredients of food to “make snow ice cream.” Keep in mind, she is a grown child that is on scholarship, so has enough money to spend for her own food, basically, and is asking me for food that she used up of mine previously and didn’t replace? Lol okay. 

Anyway,  B1 is sitting here cleaning up a “mess” that my boyfriend and I had apparently made, according to her. We were cooking so she washed the dishes that were in the sink, even though all but two of them weren’t mine, she did it very loudly and very rudely. She puts everything in places where she wants it, even if other people have put it there for a reason and she doesn’t realize it. At the end of the day, everything is based off of what she wants and not with the respect of the other people that she lives with. If you’re this type of person, please make sure that you live alone. She has sat down here the entire time I have been watching Netflix watching me, making sure that I don’t do something ‘wrong.’ I feel like I’m being babysat by someone who is only 2 years older than me, and it’s ridiculous. I don’t like it one bit, and it needs to stop. 

I already have someone who is willing to sublease and would sign the papers in an instant if I had a place to go. 

I JUST WANT THIS ALL TO GO AWAY SO FAST BEFORE I LITERALLY RIP SOMEONE’S HAIR OUT. 

College vs. high school snow days

In high school, I wanted nothing more than school to be cancelled, even if there was the smallest amount of snow on the ground. In college, I’m hopeful that if I can’t get out of my driveway, my professors will understand that I can’t risk my life to be there. Since WHEN did this become a thing?

I understand that high school students are, well, babies. They need to be protected since many of them ride buses to/from school and it’s extremely dangerous. I did both in high school and almost got into an accident one day because our superintendent still decided it’d be a good idea we have school. I understand the ramifications, but at the same time: why can’t university classes be cancelled as well? Even though I pay to go to school there, I’m required to be in class (per my professor.) Why isn’t my safety an option too? (or just anyone that in general doesn’t live on/walking distance from campus.)

This may sound mediocre to the operations people that control this, and my university has been doing better with canceling, but I still believe that it’s a problem. I attended public high school and attend a public university. I also ride the bus system that my school has in place since there’s not enough parking on campus, which I feel can relate a bit more to high school. If it isn’t safe for the bus to run, it’s not safe for me to drive my car there. The town I also live in, and my university is in, is terrible at plowing roads. I live in a subdivision full of several different roads, and I understand why the city doesn’t plow the roads (people park on the side of the road too often,) but I feel like this should be part of my university’s decision in deciding whether or not school is on or not. 

For example: my freshman year of college, I had a bunch of 11 AM’s and all that fun stuff. I usually wouldn’t wake up until 10 AM to get t my class since I lived on campus. It was a snowmaggedon that day and I woke up to snow covered EVERYTHING. Come to find out, my university hadn’t cancelled classes that day, but decided that it’d be a good idea to cancel them at 9 AM after most people were already on campus. I decided to go to my friends house (spoiler alert: this was not a good idea) and ended up stuck in the middle of a main road. Frat boys pushed me out and I eventually got to my destination, but I literally couldn’t get anywhere after that. I waited two days before I could get home. BAD decision on my university’s part. bad. 

Today, I came to school when it was barely snowing. You could see the light snow mixed in with the rain that was currently going on, but when I reached my house, it was snowing. Hard core, flaky, huge snow that was terribly cold and terribly wet. This isn’t a good idea since the temperature is supposed to drop to 13 degrees. My boyfriends roommate came home and parked his car in the driveway, and his car began sliding down the driveway after he was already out of it with the emergency brake on. (He takes really good care of his car, too—it’s his “baby” so it’s not like he didn’t have 100% tires on that car.)

here’s your sign, school.

Our chancellor tweeted out a tweet saying that the Operations people wouldn’t decide until 4 AM. They’re assessing the road conditions at 4 am. You read that right.

My boyfriend sarcastically made the remark that he’d have to get up at 4 AM if school is cancelled anyway just to make it there on time. The sad part? That’s probably true .